I've recently had a paradigm shift. Minnesotans have this battle of the wills at four way stops that is so Minnesotan. You go. No, you go! It's a wavathon. The one who waves the other driver to go first wins the battle. I've recently given up the fight and it is perfect. I go first every time. And I'm a bigger person for not engaging.
I'm sharing a picture of a harp seal. Awww.
46 comments:
I wish I had a big club.
Baby harp seal walks into a bar. Bartender says "What'll you have?" The seal replies "Anything but a Canadian Club on the rocks."
Don't tell other Minnesotans about this or there will be carnage on the highways. You art going to have to keep it to yourself.
I just got this email.....
Hi Patricia,
My name is Patricia Straub. I live in Fargo, ND and will be in St Paul, MN the weekend of May 6 & 7. I'm married and we have 3 children and 4 grandchildren.
I just wanted to email you to let you know you have a wonderfully popular name.
I know you must be a busy person so I will not be emailing you again unless you write me and want me to.
Sincerely,
Patricia (Pat)or (Patty) Straub
Write her back and tell her your real name in Patsy. She'll be green with envy. But really write her back. I once approached a Catherine Straub who taught at Ellen's school and she was like, "Yeah, big deal." Then if you meet her and decide you want to get rid of her you can just show her this blog.
you could send her a fart in a jar. that's always a good ice breaker.
Speaking of baby harp seals...we have reserved all 5 rooms at the winery where we'll be celebrating Joe's graduation, and they're all full on Saturday night, but we have a vacancy on Friday night in case someone would like to come. It has 2 queen beds and goes for $89. If we don't hear from anyone by Wednesday, we'll release it or see if Martha's parents want it.
I know a Pat J. Straub(Patrick Joseph) The J, after is day.Everyone calls his PJ. He hates it.
Thats J, after his dad. (can't type today)
Hello! You married Minnesota Nice...remember?
Or, should I say, "someone nice from Minnesota?"
Your children were Minnesota Nice born too! :-)
but they're also half Iowa Badass. which means they'll be wearing dirty wife-beaters, driving muscle cars, sporting mullets and listening to AC/DC's Back in Black while letting people go first at 4 way stops.
Back in Black is the favorite of baby harp seals everywhere.
really? because i always kind of thought they'd be more into Nazareth's Hair of the Dog.
great... now i got nazareth's hair of the dog running through my head.... dagnabbit.
Does May Day in Minnesota mean, "You may go, But, maybe you don't want to...May I go? Yes, You May!"
You can buy "Eat Baby Seals" T-shirts on eathufu.com
I don't know what May Day means anywhere except that on Timberline Trail it means that you receive and therefore, must give a bunch of candy to your neighbors youngins'. It was sweet the first year...but, know I feel as though it is an obligation I do not desire.
The first of May is a big commie day.
The red and the pink fly quite gay.
But its real happiness lay
In a fertility day
Since we're all happy to be here, don't you say?
Baby harp seals also like "Boom, boom - out go the lights"
why must i be like that?
why must i chase the cat?
nothing but the dog in me.
bow-wow-wow-yipee-yo-yipee-yay
FTR:
We did NOT give out May Day treats. I'm sure the neighbors are curious. I've decided to give out Cinco de Mayo treats instead. Why? 'Cuz I wasn't prepared and this sounded like a good way to cover my tracks!
Honestly, last year was the first time we didn't do May Day treats...even 2 years ago Caitlin did it with me. It's fun, you leave them on the front step, ring the doorbell and run! I would wait around the corner in the car ( we would go all over!) My friend from St. Louis had never heard of it before. I HIGHLY recommend starting the tradition.
We did it with a few of Peter's friends. He loved it.
Monica
Wouldn't it be fun if grownups did May Day for each other? You could ring the doorbell and leave a microbrew or some Godiva chocolates or a baby harp seal coat and then run away...
i left some farts in jars on doorsteps. with pretty ribbons on them.
Those weren't ribbons, those were stench lines. Pretty stench lines.
Well...in my effort to make up for all the May Day crap we rec'd and yet sent nothing in return...we are giving out sombreros on Cinco de Mayo! We have four houses we exchange with (who are, now, probably annoyed with me)and I have four sombreros left over from a party at Sarah's. I will drop off one hat per household and put a bag 'o Doritos and a jar of salsa in it...or, something. I don't know...I have 3 days to think about it. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh the life of a procrastinator! :-)
Any ideas? Except, for a fart in a sombrero...I'm open to suggestions!
Sorry..."bet" is me...better late than never! :-0
Why not give one of my CD's or one of my son Ricky's?
Iglesias is caca de perro! These are real lyrics:
She's into superstition
black cats and voodoo dolls.
I feel a premonition
that girl's gonna make me fall.
She's into new sensation
new kicks and candle light.
She's got a new addiction
for every day and night.
She'll make you take your clothes off and go dancing in the rain
she'll make you live the crazy life or she'll take away your pain,
like a bullet to your brain.
upside inside out
she's living la Vida loca
she'll push and pull down
she's living la Vida loca
her lips are devil red
and her skins the color mocha
she will wear you out
she's living la Vida loca
living la vida loca.
you're not fooling anyone Ricky.
Limerick Contest Ends Tomorrow!
Get your poems in.
I bet, "Ricky," is Pete! Pete gave Eli an MG3 player for his First Communion and from what I gather from the Music Selections he made...Ricky Martin is one of his Faves! :-)
I hate people who use the phrase "paradigm shift".
My whole job is based on a paradigm shift. We use it at least twice a week around here or we'll have to go back to CCD.
You Straubs'...what the hell is a paradigm shift? Do you TRY and sound fancy?
The "paradigm shift" was a revolutionary football offensive formation back in the late '20s devised by legendary Coach Red Ruffansore at Southwest Carnarsie Community State Poly Tech University at Rising Gorge. Just after the ball was snapped the backs and ends would group together and stick their hands in each others pants and then scatter in different directions. The defense didn't know whose pants the quarterback had stuffed the ball into. The rules were changed because it was considered unsanitary, even in the 20s, and they kept having to change the ball. With the change, the SWCCSPTURG program went into decline, the "Fighting Wombats" faded to remembered glory, the world grew hard and dark and the potatoes grew no more.
Ricky Martin is a living paradigm shift...He was huge at Rising George, especially when the backs and ends would group together!
Ricky worked the "late paradigm shift".
I'm kind of appalled that someone who knows all those Ricky lyrics has access to this site. Do you know the words to "Oops, I did it again"? (Trick question. Everyone knows those words. Think about it and then go scrub your brain out.)
Nance - on Cinco de Mayo, put a bottle of the nastiest tequila you can get in those sombreros. The ones who survive will have forgotten all about May Day when they wake up.
How come there's not a big festival where everyone serves out warrants and summonses on Law Day? You hand'em out and then run like hell and everyone meets at Sarah's for drinks and to trade war stories? C'mon, (insert lawyer's name here), start a tradition!
Is that like festivus?
Only if everyone tells the lawyer how he has disappointed them in the past year. But that could be fun.
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